But Moses said to God, "Who am I
that I should go to Pharaoh,
and that I should bring the children of Israel out of Egypt?"
Exodus 3:11, NKJV
Whatever Moses might have been in his past, whatever education he had, whatever training he had received, whatever position he had been groomed for, those days were long gone. He was a fugitive, an exile in a desert land, an eighty-year-old man working for his father-in-law with no other ambition, and a heartache that told him he had wasted all his potential and was past his prime. He was troubled by the affliction of his people, but considered himself powerless to do anything about it. And then one day while watching his flock of sheep, he sees a mysterious thing--a fire on the mountainside that burns but does not consume.
He approaches the bush, probably with more than a little trepidation, marveling at the shrub that survived the inferno, when from within the blazing glory the Angel of the Lord--what Biblical scholars consider the pre-incarnate Christ--appeared and speaks his name. We are not told what that voice sounded like. My technicolor imagination fills in the information gap with a deep, bassy vibrato that is felt on the flesh and within the heart, a low rumbling thunder of sound and sensation that makes the skin prickle and the hair stand on end, a commanding breath of energy and power that stops you in your tracks and draws all your attention upon it.
It called to him, "Moses, Moses!"
And he said, "Here I am."
"Don't come any closer! In fact, take your shoes off to honor my presence, for the ground upon which you stand is holy." (a slight paraphrase) Moses didn't ask, but the voice answered anyway, "I am the God of your father--the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob (I think you've heard of them--and me)."
Moses hid his face, afraid to look upon God, but there was no way to block out the sound of that voice. Perhaps cowering on the ground with his cloak wrapped up over his head, trembling and terrified that any moment might be his last, Moses might have asked himself, "Why has God come to speak to me?" Perhaps this was the day of reckoning, the day that he answered for his crimes, for his sins. Perhaps God had come at last to collect payment for the life Moses had taken, and the time he had lost. Perhaps this was the end. And it some ways it was. God was giving Moses a new job, an assignment, a commission to fulfill His sovereign will for Moses' life and the lives of numberless others.
"I have seen the oppression of my people and I've heard their cry. Now I'm going to do something about it. I have come down to deliver them from Egypt and bring them to their Promised Land. Now come with me, you're going to lead them!"
Now Moses recovered enough control over his faculties to think, and to speak. He'd tried once, with the strength of his arm and blade, to help Israel. He had failed. He'd spent decades bemoaning his failure, growing more melancholy with each passing day. He even wrote a song about it, convinced that he had nothing left to give and might as well die. In his eightieth year of life and fortieth year of exile, this was not the message Moses had expected, nor was it a message he was ready and willing to receive. In fact, as he considered the Lord's request, his heartfelt objections came to mind. And he expressed them.
"Who am I to go to Pharaoh? Who am I to bring Israel out of Egypt?" I'm nobody. I'm a washed up old has been. I've known nothing but sheep for forty years. God, you want a warrior-prince full of vim, vigor, and vitality. You don't want me.
O yes I do! "I will be with you, and when you have brought them out of Egypt, you will come back here and serve Me on this mountain." In other words, when My will has been fulfilled, I'm bring you back to the place where I called and you objected, just to show you I knew what I was doing. Even if you didn't."
"But God," Moses continues. "They're going to want to know Your Name? What am I supposed to tell them?" What credentials do I have? What experience? I don't even know how to address you properly. They're going to want to know how I know that I'm called, how I know that I've been sent. What if they have no confidence in my leadership abilities. What if they reject me."
"You tell them I AM. Tell them the God who is everything they need whenever they need me is the one who appeared to you and called you and sent you and will use you. Tell them the same God that called Abraham out of Ur and promised him Canaan is the God who has sent you. Tell them the God who sustained Isaac and provided for Jacob and preserved Joseph and protected the children of Israel is the God who has sent you. They'll follow you then. And that's when you'll all go to Pharaoh."
Sounds easy right? I can just hear Moses mumbling to himself. I'll just go back to my Israelite people and say, "I'm back, follow me!" I'll march right into the palace that used to be my home and face the son of the man who wanted me dead and tell him God said...and poof, that will be enough! Yeah, right...
As if in response to Moses inner musings, God said to Moses, "That's exactly what you're going to do. And when he does not listen to you, when he does not do what I have told you to tell him to do, when he does not honor my will, I'm going to strike mighty Egypt with my Almighty Hand, and they're going to pay you to leave!"
"But God," Moses objected again, "What if they don't believe me? What if they won't listen? What if they say You didn't appear to me?" I don't think I can take that kind of rejection!
God was not daunted by Moses' delays. He gave Moses three signs in rapid succession that would prove Moses had both been with God and was sent by God. First was the shepherd's rod that transformed into a snake and back again. Second was the healthy hand turned leprous and then made whole again. Third was the pitcher of water turned miraculously to blood. "They'll believe you have seen me after you do these things!"
"But God," Moses objected again, and I can hear the comic stutter some preachers employ to emphasize Moses confessed ineloquence, "Bu-bu-bu-bu-but G-g-g-g-g-, but God! I'm not eloquent. I'm slow of speech and slow of tongue." I don't talk good. Listen to me stutter. How can I talk to Pharaoh, I can't even talk to you. Much.
"I made that mouth," God replied. "I made it, and I'm going to use it. I'm going to fill it with words and teach you what to say."
"But God!" And this was Moses' final objection, "Can't you just, you know, send somebody else." I don't want to go. I'm not good enough. I don't have the skills. I'm really uncomfortable with the call. I'm afraid of this assignment. I've heard all you've said, and I know who you are and what you can do, but please Please PLEASE can't you just send someone else. Besides me.
The Bible says the anger of the LORD was kindled against Moses. I have to wonder. Did the burning bush blaze brighter? Did the fire burn hotter? Did God raise His voice to Moses' resistance? Almost in exasperation, if God can be exasperated, God said to Moses, "Fine. This is what I'm going to do. Your brother Aaron can speak well. I'm going to make him your assistant, your spokesman, and I'm going to tell you what to say and do, and you're going to tell him, and he's going to do it. Now go to meet him, and take your stick with you. We're going to need that stick."
So Moses went...
Have you ever argued with God about what He's asked you to do? I can tell you from personal experience that it doesn't do any good. When you get through your list of objections, complaints, and questions, when you've expressed all your doubts and fears, when you've told God all the reasons that He's wrong and you can't possible do what He's asked you to do (as if He was giving you a choice to begin with), God comes back with a simple reply.
"I hear what you're saying, and I'm able to work with that. You're the man (or woman) for the job, and I don't care how you feel about it, I still want you. Now what are you going to do?"
My answer was always like Moses. "Yes, of course, Lord. How can I say no?"
No comments:
Post a Comment