I remember the first time we met. It was late autumn or early winter, at twilight, twenty six years ago. I was standing under a tree singing with friends when you walked into my life, and my heart was knit instantly to yours. Who can explain these kinds of things, when kindred souls find and immediately gravitate one to the other? But for more than the span of my adult life, you were a major force in it.
You accepted me into your heart, into your home, into the bosom of your family. Because of you I had kith and kin I would not otherwise have known. The hours we spent together, the love and laughter we shared, the food we ate, the games we played, the long and serious conversations we had...these are among my most cherished of memories, and I will never forget them.
Your friendship provided comfort in difficult times, peace and hope when things looked so bleak. Your sense of humor brought laughter to a troubled and sometimes saddened soul, your wisdom lent advice to the occasionally wandering and lost spirit. Your honesty and practicality taught me valuable lessons about truth and life. Your shining example of Christ-like womanhood fueled my hopes and my prayers.
You were in many ways the best friend I had during my young adulthood. I don't know why, but I know it to be true. You were a counselor, a mentor, a companion and friend. I loved you. I remember the first time I said it, on the phone that day I called you after your most difficult loss. I said it to you, and you fumbled for words, not knowing how best to respond. I'm thankful for the years that we had to grow together in that love and friendship.
You gave me so many wonderful gifts in life, it would be impossible to list them all. But most especially are the ten special vests and ties that you made with your own hands for me. I wore one last week, just so that I could remember you again.
It seems almost impossible to put into words the pain I feel at losing you. This separation was never my choice. Beyond our control were the miles and the years between us. I saw you as much as I could, but I never knew that the last time would really be the last time. You never got to see the greatest joys of my life, hear the most thrilling stories. I hope that your memories of me were ones of the happy times we shared, and not the heartaches we encountered later.
I remember the last time we met. It was an afternoon in springtime, and we went for a walk together in the sunshine. We caught up, we laughed together. I think I cried. It was wonderful to know that I still had a place in your heart, in your life for me, that you still felt for me what I had always felt from you. I wish I had known that the last time would truly be the last time. Perhaps I would have said more to let you know just how important you were to me.
And now you're gone for good, and I'll not have another chance to see you, to say what I feel for you, to enjoy the warmth of your company. I cannot even grieve as I would have liked, surrounded by all those who love you and are thankful that you passed this way. It is entirely my loss, and I mourn alone. But I am grateful for the years of friendship that we shared, and I look forward to the next time we meet on Heaven's bright side. Until then, let me just say...
When peace like a river attendeth my way,
when sorrows like sea billows roll,
whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,
"It is well, It is well with my soul!"
And I know it is also well with yours.
Farewell, my friend, my other Gramma, my DoDo, my Ol' Gal!
Doris Mae Fish Witmer
(1921-20017)
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